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Book3:WereMyDreamIs (第160/327页)
ngandtakehimforallIcould.Butas,perhapsIwastoogreedyforwhenIlookedatthediamondwhichIheldtightlyinmyhandthefollowingday,thegreendiamondhadturoaonrock.FatepyedagreatjokeohebirdIalreadyhadinhandjustflewaway.IsupposeIwasdestiobeabeggar,notfittoenjoyenormouswealththatjustdroppedintomyp!Myluckisreallybad…IsupposeifIhadnotbeensogreedyandsoldthediamondforareasonableprice,Iwouldnowbeawealthyman.ButIwastoogreedyandmydiamondturostone…Idon’tknowhowheavenarrangesmainies.Somepeoplehavemoremohantheyeverspendintheirwholelifetime,whileIampoorasachurchmouseandroamthestreetsalldayenduringhungerandthirstlikeawilddog…Ireallydon’tknowhowheavendistributesthewealthoftheworld…Ismylifereallysocheapandinsequential?” Theblueskiesbecamedeeperanddarker.Davidwasamannearingoldage.Thenumerouswrinklesonhisfaceseemedtobetellingofthemisfortunesofhislife.HespoketoDimitriremorsefullyandangrilyandtakingouthiscrumpledaper,selectedanarettebuttandofferedittoDimitri. “No,thankyou,I’vealreadyeheoneyoujustgaveme”repliedDimitri.“Iamnotaddictedtosmokingsoyouhadbetterkeepitforyourself.”Davidsoftlyrolledittoitsinalroundshapewithhisfingers,looseniobasidewithoutspillingany.Helightedit,inhaleddeeplyandthenpuffedoutthesmoke.Hetinued, 12 “MylifeisreallycheapandIreallydon’tknoilldie.PerhapsIwillbeecriticallyilheroadside.Iwillbeeanuncimedcorpse,aJohnDoemissedbyhepolicewouldreleasemybodytosomemedicalfacility,whointurnwillgiveittosomeprofessorofAnatomyandPhysiologytobeusedtoteachhismedicalstudentshowtodissectahumanbody.Iwillbeidonasbinabandtheprofessorwillusehisscalpeltoopenupmybody,takeoutmyheart,liver,stomach,kidneyandans.Hewillylimbsandmyheadanddividethemamonghisstudentstodoexperimentson.Imyselfdon’treallyknowwhattheinsideofmybodyislike,buttheprofessorwillusemybodytoteachhisstudentssaying,“Thisismuscle…thisishisishumanbrain…It’sreallyun-nervingtopte…Intheendmybodywillbeeaheapofstripsandslices.ButIsupposethat’salrightsinceIamdeadalreadyandwohing…ButIamreallyunwillingtodiewithoutknowingwhatmydestinyislike…Whentheydismembermybody,perhapstheycouldalsofindwhatmyfate,mydestinywaslike…Ohwell,Dimitri,IthinkthatlikeyouIamalsogiventoflightsoffancy.What’stheuseofthinkingaboutthesethings?Iamfeelinghungryagain.Thisstomaineisreallytroublesome.It’slikeabottomlesspitthateverbefilled…IsupposeIwouldhavetotrymyludseeifIfindsomethi.Goodbyemyoldfrie’sbothgoourownwaytogetsomefood.”Sayingso,theagingmanstoodup,dustedtheseatofhispantsandtinuedonhiswayalongtheroadside. Intheblueskiesthesun,graduallysettingi.waslikeatorwillingtobeextinguishedandwasgivingforththeremainderofhisenergy.AfterDavidleft,Dimitri’smindwasinturmoil.Hewaswhowhislifewouldend.PerhapsitwouldbejustastragidwretchedasDavid’s,dyingbytheroadsideandgivenbytheauthoritiestomedicalfacilitiesasacorpsetobedissectedasexperimentsformedicalstudents.Tobehigh-miwouldbeatributiontosocietytodonateone’sbodytofurtherstificresearch.“Butmyfateisevenworse”hethought..“AtleastDavidwasabletoseewithhiseyeswhilehewasaliveandhismovementswerefree.ButIotsee,
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